:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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