garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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