Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
