dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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