Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
