you would pick up someone in the library
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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