But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
She bit a glass in half.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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