508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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