READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
