I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize