ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
a search helicopter?!
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
