He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
