I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
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