how can u be prego again
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
