we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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