He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
