Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
