It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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