Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
