Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
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