I smell stomach acid.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
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