i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
