is your mom at the bar?
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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