so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
