Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
