Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
