this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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