i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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