Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
