I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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