Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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