How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
