I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
