I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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