I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
