can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
