but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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