if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
