That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
