what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
