3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
