dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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