just survived the first fart of the relationship.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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