Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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