I don't usually arrange sex via text message
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
