So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
