I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
