You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
