he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
