He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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